Monday, May 14, 2007

The Hound of the B(h)askervilles

Mr. Sherlock Holmes, who was usually very late in the mornings, save upon those not infrequent occasions when he was up all night, was seated at the breakfast table. I stood upon the hearth-rug and picked up the newspaper which our visitor had left behind him the night before. It was an Urdu daily called Siasat, published from Hyderabad. It was more than a year old issue.
"Well, Watson, what do you make of it?"
Holmes was sitting with his back to me, and I had given him no sign of my occupation.
"I think," said I, following as far as I could the methods of my companion, "that Siasat is well-esteemed by Hyderabad residents. Since I do not know Urdu, I cannot read it though.”
"Good!" said Holmes. "Excellent!"
“But, there is a report about the wife of Nizam whose property case is pending in a family court. Interestingly, the same article had appeared in HT of TOI. The author and photograph used are the same. Ironically it happens to be written by HT editor herself. The question is how can HT editor write the same article in another daily?” said Holmes.
“That is strange,” said I.
"And then again, the court verdict was in favour of the Nizam’s wife and she got property worth crores of rupees," said Holmes, pushing back his chair and lighting a cigarette.
“That’s quiet normal,” I said because I had often been piqued by his indifference to my admiration and to the attempts that I had made to give publicity to his methods.
“I had tried to sneak into the lady editor’s house in Banjara Hills one fine evening and dear Watson, I was taken aback to see the luxury the woman was enjoying at her capacious flat.” Then with an expression of interest he laid down his cigarette.
“Given the fact that she was an ordinary private school teacher a few years ago and taking into consideration the financial status she had those days, the whole chain of events turn very interesting,” Holmes was getting more complex.
“Has anything escaped me?" I asked with some self-importance. "I trust that there is nothing of consequence which I have overlooked?"
"I am afraid, my dear Watson, that most of the times your conclusions were erroneous. To be frank, in noting your fallacies I was occasionally guided towards the truth,” said Holmes.
“I, in the guise of a courier boy, frequented TOI office and counted the parcels that went to the lady’s cabin and I found them high in number and often big in size,” Holmes said with his inimitable smile.
"I enquired about her children’s lifestyle and honestly, they get everything free everywhere.”
I was getting confused.
“And what do you think of those pictures appearing in their Page 3 on and off?”
“They are very happening people in Hyderabad. They are the inner circle of the society,” I said.
“Oh, no Watson. They are not the elite people of this city. The elite never like to see the paper, leave alone being featured,” Holmes was really driving me nuts.
"You may be right," I said.
"The probability of this lady editor being very corrupt lies in that direction. And if we take this as a working hypothesis, we have to find out where she was most recently.”
“She can go on her personal works,” I was trying to defend the woman whom I always regarded as an eminent journalist.
"Well, then, that is why I say you are a moron. Leaving her husband and children, why did she go to the hot Turkey in this summer?”
Holmes was getting really serious.
"Do none suggest themselves? You know my methods. Apply your brain. I can only think of the obvious conclusion that the Princess she wrote a lot about in her paper belongs to Turkey. Now, if you think that you have little sense, try to link all these and come back to me tomorrow,” saying this, Holmes walked out of the room.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Power struggle in Times!

A hooded hisser from the Times House has a lot to say on why the Ed, Nag sits on job offer letters. Below is his cryptic explanation that would surely keep many busy this weekend guessing the import. We are tempted to run a contest -- Analyze this! Try and shoot your answers. Happy weekend!

My dears, Don’t jump to hasty conclusions without knowing about what is making Nag, to keep aspirants on their tenterhooks. Asking for his blood - like the ToI, that put out an all out fight (if you like, you can add: shamelessly) against that poor Jaipur Magistrate, along with its coterie of Bollywood buddies and battery of its courtiers. Just to encash a gorey… gorey… long..y long...y miti…miti…news, for more than a week or so. (Poor fellas, seem to have no business IQ in their heads. For, more than ToI, the Kamasutra condoms got good branding, without paying a single pie to ToI.)
Coming back to our story, of Nag, of aspiring scribes and of a sundry buro - try to understand, before throwing mud, on the face of any one. Both, you and the blog managers misunderstood Nag, in reasoning, why he is showing abnormal delay, in taking aspiring jurnos into ToI.
To clear the air, I am giving the inside story to you all, Ok:-
Whoever, from now onwards, going to join in ToI, will have to work in a sundry buro that earned a notorious name, among all other buros of ToI, in Southern India. Nag is finding it difficult, to remove the disease that infected this buro.
Because, the centre of gravity of this sundry buro was about to be removed by the management last year. But, this mortal had gone and fell on the feet of - the "Only Sunday Jesus believers" and rest of the week "Satanic Verses" - occupying big seats, up there, and got his skin saved. These are members of the new power lobbies that are now at work, in ToI, after that big guy left to DNA, deserting ToI.

Now, it is clear to Nag, as of now, he is helpless and there is no scope to cure or remove the deadly disease, infecting this buro. So, the only way left out for this top man of ToI, is to bring in the best resistant capable cells, that could withstand, fight and survive against the existing malady of this buro. What all that he is doing is, making the aspirants to wait, to a breaking point. Just, to test their survival capacities, to make sure, they will continue as long as he is on the top of ToI, in HYD.
Given this back ground, now you may ask, why all this hell? Here is the answer:
Going by the experiences of this sundry buro, it was found out by Nag and some others - the cerebral geometry of the centre of gravity of this buro is polluted worse than the Musi. How?
Early shocks:
The new journos, intended to join in ToI, walks in… humming… smiling… happy to be a part of the world’s largest paper…Only to find out that there is an assignment in store… for him/her, at 6 in the morning, somewhere beyond Golkonda, to cover a youth fest. Not surprising, the new journo don’t mind, even to cycle the 40 something kms, to bring a colorful item, to prove his/her talent, to the main buddy of the buro. First, moments… of Josh in ToI you know... Isahi hota hai!
Then, when one reaches there, the new jurno’s senses will come to hosh… finding, to his dismay, the dudes of the youth fest, from different colleges are busy in brushing their teeth or going to natural calls.
Morning Blues -- Metro Silver Pack:
With a good morning coffee in hand, the poor new journo turns the ToI next morning…Ummah… only to see his item used as a filler of four lines. Followed with this, rings your mobile… the name that flashes on the screen, sure to remind the poor new thing, a corgi standing and staring right before him or her. No way, you respond to the call… take it for granted…. @ of any notes of the music, of even those living in the remotest African jungles… the voice is not musical to hear in a morning time, after the early shocks. You hear… a creaky voice saying, "I don’t know what you do, and I want two". Means, lay two eggs (stories) a day, with no hatching time given (Not surprising, even if the eggs of him for years, most of the time, lifted ones hatched by others). That’s when, the new thing, starts feeling a crane-fly creeping and crawling on his body or a condor circling over his/ her head.

Guru Gyan -- Metro Combo Offer:
This is the time when the cronies of the centre of gravity preach you the Guru Gyan as part of the Metro Combo offer. Talk to him nicely… speak to him… take him to lunch… etc. Means, surrender and be a chemcha and work for him but not to ToI. Other than occasionally offering of kitty parties...act like an informer… relaying to the main buddy, whatever your pals in the buro are talking… chatting… etc etc. If you surrender, you can smile all the way… a promotion… a pay hike… few hours of work… (This includes, lifting items from Enadu, Andhra Jyothy, IE, Vartha..etc...a privileged buddy you will be.(Informers of this virus are there in the buro, desk as well as HT).
The Basic Instinct - Metro Wild Pack:
Victims: A buro scribe/a HT scribe and Nag's first secretary
I will continue: next time
Black Box, Kala Ghar, 2nd Building, Next to grave yard and Besides Rangoli,
Third Road, Banjara Tribe Hills, Bhagyanagar.

Friday, May 11, 2007

Soulless sport stars

In sport, does the country come first or one’s own career?
This should-never-arise question sadly pops up repeatedly in India. Bringing us back to this question now is the tiff between Badminton Association of India (BAI) and three top players. The players are crying foul that their federation is jeopardizing their international careers, while the federation vehemently denies any wrongdoing.

First, the story so far is: The federation refused permission to three players from Andhra Pradesh – Chetan Anand, his wife Jwala Gutta and her doubles partner Shruthi Kurien – to play in two tournaments abroad and instead asked them to attend a six-week camp in Hyderabad during the same period. The players contend that they would have possibly gained some points by playing in these tournaments and improved their world rankings in their bid for an Olympic berth. The federation, on the other hand, maintains that missing two events when about 25 tournaments are still on the calendar does not make any difference. Valid point, indeed!

The fallout of face-off: the players refused to attend the camp and the federation ignored them for selection to the Indian team, citing government guidelines that stipulate that players attend the pre-tournament camp to be considered for national team.
Who is to be faulted? The players can insist on their right to chart their own individual careers and plead that the federation, if it’s not in a position to help their cause, should not at least come in their way. The federation too is right in demanding that players, while pursuing their individual careers, are duty-bound to serve the nation.
The fact that the issue is being keenly followed up by the media indicates that the players concerned are stars in their own right. Had it not been the case, neither the federation, nor the badminton fraternity or the media would have cared to give them a second look.

It is quite possible that the federation was keen on having the three top players represent the country — they are crucial to the team’s prospects. Chetan is the country’s top men’s player and Jwala-Shruthi is the top women’s doubles pair and the trio can boost India’s prospects. Maybe, being the best must be the reason why the players wanted to skip the preparation camp. They stand to gain little by attending camps where they have no equals to play against and improve their game. Therefore, the best way for them is to compete on the circuit and gain as many places as possible on the world rankings. Perfect logic!

But the point is do the players have a heart — for the game and its growth in the country? Agreed the top players have nothing to learn at the camps, but how about providing an opportunity to the upcoming players to play against you and better their game, contributing to their and the game’s growth? Surely, Chetan benefited immensely from his on-field clashes with Pullela Gopichand. Isn’t it immature for this boy-faced player to now indulge in ego-clash that benefits none and hurts all, most importantly the game and Indian team’s prospects?

Players should always remember that they are not bigger than the game. The reluctance of Indian Test players (including fallen star Azhar and fading star Sachin) to play Ranji matches has a lot to do with today’s paucity of cricket talent pool in India.

Not long ago, our Telugu bidda, the humpty dumpty Koneru Humpy committed the same crime. The chess player, having grown beyond everybody else in the country, found it meaningless to play in National tournaments. She avoided all tournaments in India, ignoring earnest appeals. Her participation would have helped other budding stars to improve ELO rating and secure IM norms, should they by chance defeat her, a GM. Humpy knew this, or at least her father-coach did, and avoided national events!

Do our much-adored sport stars every rise above petty personal goals and think and act as Indians? Will they ever put the game before themselves?
It is here that Leander Paes stands tall, without comparison. How playing for the nation motivates him to pull all the stops is a legend in its own.

Monday, May 07, 2007

Maa TV in doldrums

The once-successful Maa TV is once again going through turmoil. On Monday, News Desk head Bhavanarayana resigned. The issue of delay in hikes to news desk staff is said to be the reason! The management reportedly requested him stay put. Bhavanarayana’s resignation may not be linked to the recent developments, but would be seen as another indication of the trouble at the channel.
The channel is owned by four big names — original promoter Muralikrishnam Raju, industrialists Nimmagadda (Matrix) Prasad and film stars Chiranjeevi-Akkineni Nagarjuna. But only one man is said to be calling the shots – Sarat Marar, close to Allu Arvind and Chiru-Pavan brothers. After Marar’s entry the role of Sarma (former chairman of Prasar Bharati) was hastily changed from CEO to advisor and then sidelined. Soon, the channel’s creative head, Adivi ‘Forest’ Srinivas, credited with multiple hit programmes, left because of too much of interference. Forest is now with NTV.
Writer Kuppili Padma was taken as head of Serial programmes but is now considered as a bad choice. Her position became tenuous after Nag’s make-up man Chandra raised a stink on Padma’s demands for telecasting a serial he produced. She survives though.
Benjamin from Zee who is incharge for promotions is doing no great work. Chandrasekhar, with experience in production and admin, and now heading the creative wing, is no better. His first idea, a phone-in programme, was stopped after the first episode! It is to be seen if the latest brain roped in by Marar, Radio City’s Sai, would be any better.


Bu‘dan’ quits:
There’s hardly anyone in the Eenadu editorial staff who doesn’t know this friendly Don. Work-obsessed Budan, seen at office at all hours of the day for more than a decade, is on the way out. He is on long leave! Starting as contributor in Chittoor district (during which period he faced the ire of communal elements), Budan was associated with Eenadu for more than 15 years and worked in various departments.
No news on which new news channel he might prefer!

Thursday, May 03, 2007